Forced gay straight

Because I’d bet those same

In , I was sent to prison on drug-related charges linked to the manufacturing and distribution of a controlled substance. I had just turned twenty-five and had no idea of what life was like behind bars. I also happen to identify as straight. That really doesn’t have anything to do with it but I’m just sharing for background. Ciaran shares his experience of being sexually assaulted by another man and why he is speaking out about it.

Video and words by Sam Leader, ITV News' Here's The Story. Ciaran was 21 when he was. When I was 14 he forced me to give him oral sex and when he raped me for the first time I don’t remember exactly how old I was, but it was horrific. My brain tried to block out the painful. The man rose from the bed, grabbed David’s toothbrush weapon, held it to John’s cheek, and forced him down. This prisoner had a jar of Vaseline, but it did not do much; after he left, John found blood on his clothes.

John says he was raped several more times by both his cellmate and strangers. For victims who are gay, there are complexities associated with homophobia. A gay victim is reluctant to speak out and be labeled a traitor. Here is how we can help facilitate a victim’s recovery. These articles are about special topics related to OCD and related disorders. For more general information, please visit our "About OCD" section.

OCD, as we know, is largely about experiencing severe and unrelenting doubt. It can cause you to doubt even the most basic things about yourself — even your sexual orientation. I have observed this symptom in young children, adolescents, and adults as well. Interestingly Swedo, et al. The most obvious form is where a sufferer experiences the thought that they might be of a different sexual orientation than they formerly believed.

If the sufferer is heterosexual, then the thought may be that they are homosexual. If on the other hand they happen to be homosexual they may obsess about the possibility that they might really be straight. Going a step beyond this, some sufferers have obsessions that tell them that they may have acted, or will act, on their thoughts. A variation on doubt about sexual identity would be where the obsessive thought has fastened onto the idea that the person simply will never be able to figure out what their sexual orientation actually is.

For those with thoughts of being homosexual, part of the distress must surely be social in origin. I suppose this remains a question for research to answer. The older psychoanalytic therapies often make people with this problem feel much worse by saying that the thoughts represent true inner desires. This has never proven to be so. Doubting something so basic about yourself can obviously be quite a torturous business.

When I first see people for this problem, they are typically engaged in any number of compulsive activities which may occupy many hours of each day. Compulsive questioning can frequently take place, and usually involves others who may be close to the sufferer. The questions are never-ending and repetitive. Some of the more typical questions sufferers are likely to ask can include those in the following two groupings:.

How do I know whether I prefer women or men? How does anyone tell what sex they really are? How will I ever be able to tell for certain? Do you think I could be gay or straight? At what point in their lives do people know what their orientation is? Can you suddenly turn into a homosexual or heterosexual even if you have never felt or acted that that way? Did I just act sexually toward you?

Do I look or act gay or straight to you? Did I just touch you? If I get sexual sensations when viewing sexual material of an opposite orientation does it mean I am gay or straight? In terms of the last question above, one of the most difficult situations for this group of sufferers is when they experience a sexual reaction to something they feel would be inappropriate.

A typical example would be a heterosexual man who experiences an erection while looking at gay erotica.